Walk A Mile In Her Heels - Chrissy

I've known Chrissy online for, I guess, two years or so. She's a fascinating person, and I knew that she'd be an interesting read for anyone who wants to get to know her story. Now back in her native Canada after many years living Florida, Chrissy has unique perspectives that I've been looking forward to sharing.

She's put a lot of thought into the questions I posed to her, as you will read. Since these were typed responses, I have elected to retain as much of her personal writing style as I could, while making the words fit the page and have a nice flow. I hope you enjoy walking a mile in Chrissy's heels.
Previously in the "Walk A Mile In Her Heels" series: Suzi

Shannyn Comes Alive: You now live feminine full-time and are on HRT. Let's start by having you tell us a little bit about your upbringing. 

Chrissy: I was born at the end of the Baby Boomer generation. The 1960s & '70s were upon us and things were changing a Lot. But for me as a young kid, I grew up in a very Conservative post-British Empire Culture. I had loving parents and grandparents, but it was a very conservative and religious upbringing. My Mom & Sister knew about me as a child but things like that were just not spoken about.

When I turned 11 years old, I was packed off to an All Boys Boarding school. The first few years were Very unpleasant, but by high school I found my groove as a '70s carefree kid, looking for good times. I conformed, and my young adult life was spent as a young Man others could be comfortable with. I was part ski bum, part sailing and windsurfing bum, and all-round good times seeker. I also had some lucky breaks career-wise and things were going really well, but as You gals know...there was always something in the back of my mind, that made my heart and soul ache.

SCA: So, like so many, you suppressed your feminine side. How were you able to deal with that situation until you felt ready to transition?

Chrissy: I learned to "compartmentalize" my life. I would dress when I could, and free my spirit for those short times when I could do so safely. For me and I know many others, it is VERY difficult to live that way, it continued to grow harder, and I'd end up asking questions like, "Am I lying to everyone or is it the protection of privacy for their sakes and my own?"

The internal struggle and conflict stressed me, almost to the point of emotional breakdown on a few occasions. Hence, in my late 40's a decision and an awakening came to be, and I finally embraced who I Really am.

SCA: You mentioned having that feeling that made your heart and soul ache. That seems to be a common theme amongst trans people. In fact, maybe it is THE theme. The path to transition is often not a straight line, and certainly not in your case. A lot of your steps you've taken to become your most authentic and comfortable self are relatively recent. Tell me about the decision a couple years ago to start HRT. Why was the time right then, as opposed to earlier?

Chrissy: Unlike some gals, I don't really have an actual date that I began to transition; it was more of a slow evolution for me. As I mentioned, in my very late 40's I had a realization that I really needed to transition to feel my life was complete and that I wouldn't die with a lot of misgivings and regrets for not living my life Truly as I wanted to. So right about when I turned 50, my whole mindset changed, and how my heart felt followed and it changed, too. Though challenging at times, it was a refreshing feeling and I was excited about Life again. 

Times are changing quickly, but even as of 10 years ago, to be transgender and wanting to transition was regulated by WPATH guidelines, so off I went on that journey. I went to a very good Gender Dysphoria Therapist and was making progress, but due to some business issues, I had to back off for a bit. Then a couple years later I started to see another one (the first had retired), but that didn't work out, so then I attended a 3rd Therapist.

I would like to say, I always enjoyed my sessions with the Therapists, enjoyed the conversations and Yes, did learn things about myself and being transgender. I looked forward to the sessions, BUT...I began to feel growing frustration over not being able to get where I wanted to with it.

In early 2017, I learned about the Transgender Programs thru Planned Parenthood of Central Florida. I made an appointment and talked with a Registered Nurse Specialist, gave blood labs and a couple weeks later I FINALLY was prescribed HRT. It was a Very exciting moment for me, it felt like a tremendous breakthrough and I was thrilled that my journey was moving forward at a new level. Many things in my Life, including the contact with Planned Parenthood as well as business responsibilities, all lined up at an ideal time for me. The Universe had spoken.

SCA: Something I have always appreciated about you is how you tend to try to steer people towards being positive. How did that attitude come about? Was it always there within you, or something you had to develop to get through the difficult times of being trans and still living as a male?

Chrissy: I came from a very patriarchal family, which was also a source of grief for a young trans gal,  but Both My GrandFather and Father were Very optimistic Men, that was an early influence for me.

At times in my life, I have been in some deep dark places emotionally, but I always had hope, and it would pull me thru. Starting to learn the attitudes and philosophies of Yoga as well as Freeing myself of Internal Conflict from being Transgender has only reinforced my optimism. Then there is My Sister, who I love, has Always stood with me. I am SO Grateful to have Her in my Life, She is an inspiration to me.

SCA: Ahh, yes, you mentioned doing yoga. I have myself referred to you as "hippie-like", in that you seem very close to the Earth and the people who occupy it. What else has shaped your outlook on life?

Chrissy: When I was in Grade 7, in Science Class, we were talking about Evolution vs. Creationism, and while I was sitting there I had like a revelation that it was BOTH, The Universe was created and The Power Source and All Being uses Evolution of course. Not to get all theological or philosophical, but that is when I became a Spiritual Person. The Planet is my Temple, Nature is my Spirituality, I am a Star child of the Universe. My Gender transition has not changed who I am, it's just given me Freedom in the way I express it.

I am a very curious person and student of life.  I was struggling with long term lower back issues. When I started to look seriously into Yoga Practices, it just simply made sense to me. I decided to give it a try and to open my mind to what I could learn from it. I am VERY Grateful for the journey and for the Lifestyle.

SCA: Tell me about your decision to start eating healthier.

Chrissy: My change in diet is more a factor of growing old than anything else; some of You may know the feeling of seeing the beauty of youth slowly disappearing and the fitness of the body morphing as one grows old.  I was working hard trying to be fit, and I knew it's not all about external looks, internal health is even more important. So I decided to change my diet.  

The first step was to quit Fast Food, the quick fix at lunchtime, etc.  I was lucky to meet a roommate who was a very good cook and she mentored me a lot on just basic cooking. Soon I found that I really enjoyed cooking and messing around in the kitchen. I would try new dishes and read new recipes etc. As I learned more my diet slowly moved to more whole foods and then more plant-based. I am not a True Vegan, though I am totally inspired towards that philosophy...I will evolve.

SCA: You moved back to Canada this year after living for many years in Florida. What's your perspective on the two countries as a trans woman, having moved back home after so many years?

Chrissy: I am a proud Canadian AND a proud US Citizen. I love both my Countries and the two really are like Brother & Sister. There are endless lists of Pros & Cons, but Both are Great Countries. Canada is a more liberal country, so as far as LGBTQ policies it is more progressive and protective to the community's Rights. America seems to be regressing in this aspect, but I have confidence in the future. The Youth of today are very smart people with tremendous potential.  

SCA: In terms of HRT and transitioning, what differences might you cite, now that you are seeing doctors and getting your medicines north of the border?

Chrissy: One of the biggest differences has been in my HRT regime. In Florida, I was prescribed Spironolactone as my anti-androgen. When I started to see my Ontario Endocrinologist, He switched me over to Cyproterone Acetate. I am NOT a trained medical expert, and we are each different, so keep that in mind with this information. Estrogen (Estradiol) is the same on both sides of the border, though my Canadian Doctors have upped my dosage.

My understanding is that most of the world (i.e., Canada, Europe, Australia, etc.) mainly use Cyproterone as the antI-androgen for transgender people, however, it is not a USDA approved substance, so in the US, transgender women are prescribed Spiro instead. A good side-effect of switching to Cyproterone is that I don't suffer from dizzy spells anymore. I have always had low blood pressure, even as a kid. Spironolactone lowers blood pressure even further, so that really affected me in a bad way.

SCA: Any advice to those who are just looking into HRT for the first time?

ChrissyI just want to encourage/plead to any gals/guys who are contemplating an HRT regime to do Your diligence, research, and always use hormones with medical supervision, wherever You are located. Always remember that One's personal health is THE most important thing in life.

SCA: You're all settled back in Ontario now. Are you just taking your daily meds at this point, or looking into anything additional, medically speaking, now that you are a couple years into your transition?

Chrissy: Currently, Ontario Health Insurance covers my Doctor visits and my Lab works, but not my medications. Otherwise, I am only just starting to look as surgical possibilities & options, so I will have to leave that whole discussion for another time.

SCA: Being a dual resident myself, I am very curious about living as trans back in Canada versus where I live in the USA. I wonder about things like legal documents, etc. I suppose you have gone through this on both sides of the border, or it's in the works. Anything you can tell us about that whole process?

Chrissy: Being a Dual Citizen is really nice in that it gives me more options about where to live and work on our little planet, but it also involves more paperwork in daily life, taxes, etc. When it comes to identifications it at least doubles the amount of work involved, especially if one wants to change names and gender markers.

Maybe the Universe knew all along and guided my Mother into naming me a fairly gender-neutral name, so I have decided not to change my name, however, the gender marker is another story.  In Canada there is an option to have gender as M, F, or X.  The X marker sounded interesting at first as I am kinda over the whole stiff Binary attitudes of people and society regarding gender. But at the current time, many areas of the USA and other parts of the world do Not recognize the X marker.  I am hoping to do some international travel in the near future, so I'm working to comply and get my ID matched up with my identity.

To do that, since I was born in Ontario, step one is to change my gender on my Official Birth Certificate, then Drivers License, and Health Card. This is just a matter of filling out forms and then waiting. Once I have that sorted out I will apply for a new Canadian Passport. After all that, I will have to deal with my US citizenship identification and my Social Security, but that's just more paperwork stuff. Fun, fun.

SCA: Regardless of where you are living, do you run into any day-to-day difficulties living as a trans person?

Chrissy: I don't have a lot of day to day issues. I have surrounded myself with good friends with open minds and acceptance. I asked the Universe, and try my best, to be open to those that are brought into my life. Sadly at times, I have had to distant myself from people who I feel negative vibes from, but they are very few really. Other than that, Improper use of pronouns can hurt at times, but I think about it, and let it pass, and move on. 

SCA: Tell me something about you that people would be surprised to know.

Chrissy: I am a Free Spirit...I am a hopeless romantic, I'm a progressive thinking trans gal, but there is some old fashioned stuff in my heart.

My Theme Song for 2019:



SCA: That's a fantastic old song by someone who excelled on both sides of the border. Thanks for sharing it. Do you have any other words of encouragement you'd like to pass along before we wrap up?

Chrissy: I believe the most Important thing is to embrace Yourself, live Your Best Being. We need to accept ourselves and treat ourselves well if we expect others to accept us and treat us well. 2020 will be an Awesome Year...Be Ready! 

SCA: Chrissy, thank you so much for your time and candid answers. I want to sign this off by asking: what's the best thing about being you?

Chrissy: I am VERY blessed, I was born into a loving & accepting family. I live in one of the best places in the world. I have never lacked good food, water, shelter, and I have been blessed with Good Health. I am Truly Grateful and I try to keep that foremost in my mind & heart each day. ❤

Comments

  1. Very nice profile and I can see so many similarities to my own path. Thanks for this Shannyn

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